I love that stupid expression. Anyway, I should have called this one Week PICK 6, amirite, Matt Schaub? (sorry)
Thursday 10/10
New York Giants at Chicago Bears
Well, I picked the Giants again. And they screwed me again. GOD, THE GIANTS SUCK. I didn't think they'd be any more than a .500 team this year. But I didn't see them going 2-14 either. What the hell, Jerry Reese? This is the team you assembled? Who's your right hand man, Mike Tannenbaum? I had the little giants winning.
Giants 24
Bears 21
Sunday 10/13
Cincinnati at Buffalo
Buffalo is a flaming dumpster fire right now, at least at QB.
Bengals 27
Bills 14
Detroit at Cleveland
I really want to pick the Browns, but I can't. Detroit is just too good this year...assuming that Calvin Johnson is playing. He's currently a "game-time decision." Ugh. Well, I'll take the Lions anyway in this battle of rust belt cities.
Lions 21
Browns 13
Oakland at Kansas City
Sweet! A classic AFL matchup, my favorite kind of matchup. If the Jets ever go belly up, I'm definitely switching to one of these two teams. Because, well, the AFL was awesome. Anyway, in 2013, this is a mismatch. Arrowhead will be rocking, and while I expect a close game, I think the Chiefs win.
Chiefs 24
Raiders 17
Carolina at Minnesota
Woof, a pillow fight between two bad teams. I'll take the Vikings at home, I suppose. Also...ugh, Adrian Peterson's kid. What a horrible story. There's no hell on earth awful enough for the piece of shit that would beat a 2 year old to death.
Vikings 20
Panthers 14
Pittsburgh at New York Jets
Great, now I have some expectations for the Jets. The Jets are Lucy, I am Charlie Brown, and this game is the football I'm supposed to kick. Sorry, Jets, you're not fooling me this time.
Steelers 17
Jets 13
Philadelphia at Tampa Bay
The Eagles take on the Buccaneers, who are also currently battling a rash of staph infections, proving once again that Greg Schiano is a disgusting human being. Mike Vick is injured (for a change), but since both of the quarterbacks playing in this game are pretty dreadful, I'd say it's still nothing better than a toss-up. Tampa's defense is pretty good, so...Tampa?
Bucs 20
Eagles 19
Green Bay at Baltimore
This is another tough one, two teams that on paper are good - but both seem to be missing something this year, no? I guess I like Baltimore at home, but that's really just another toss-up pick for me. This could easily go Green Bay's way. You know what? F it. I'm picking Green Bay.
Packers 30
Ravens 24
St. Louis at Houston
Well, Houston sucks, but they've probably got enough firepower to beat the Rams, even with Schaub throwing touchdowns for the other team week in and week out.
Texans 24
Rams 20
Jacksonville at Denver
LOL!
Broncos 50
Jaguars 3
Tennessee at Seattle
The Ryan Fitzpatrick Show rolls into Seattle this week, with predictable results.
Seahawks 31
Titans 17
Arizona at San Francisco
49ers all day in this one, baby.
49ers 30
Cardinals 16
New Orleans at New England
Please oh please let New England lose again. I love it when New England loses. I love it even more than I love making fun of Tom Brady's stupid euro-trash haircut.
Saints 27
Patriots 24
Washington at Dallas
Well, Dallas definitely had the most impressive defeat of the season last week, so there's that. I don't think the Redskins are any good, and it's IN Dallas, so hopefully Romo doesn't herp a derp at the end of the game this time.
Cowboys 31
Redskins 20
Monday 10/14
Indianapolis at San Diego
Ooh, I like this matchup for a Monday night. I'm gonna say that the Colts outslug the Chargers in a fun, high scoring game (of course since I just wrote that, it'll be like 9-6 in an epic field goal duel).
Colts 34
Chargers 31
Last week: 9-5
Season: 48-29
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