SON OF A BITCH
I had a whole damned thing typed here, and then I accidentally typo'd badly and deleted everything. And then this STUPID GODDAMNED thing "auto-saved" my changes.
So with LIMITED commentary, here are my rapid fire picks. Some of you probably prefer it this way every week, and for that, we are FRENEMIES FOR LIFE.
Onto the picks. AGAIN.
Thursday 10/31
Cincinnati at Miami
Florida is a weird state and we should cut it loose, setting it adrift.
Bengals 24
Dolphins 20 (whoops)
Sunday 11/3
New Orleans at New York Jets
Sigh...I'd love to pick my Jets here, but no. No.
Saints 31
Jets 20
Kansas City at Buffalo
Chiefs gotta lose eventually, right? Yeah, but not this week.
Chiefs 20
Bills 17
Minnesota at Dallas
The Vikings are the Jaguars of the NFC. By which I mean they're disgraceful and always a threat to relocate.
Cowboys 27
Vikings 10
Tennessee at St. Louis
Hurt Locker!
Titans 17
Rams 13
San Diego at Washington
Gah, I don't know, Chargers?
Chargers 34
Redskins 27
Atlanta at Carolina
Falcons, I guess. I don't love this pick.
Falcons 28
Panthers 24
Philadelphia at Oakland
Raiders are tough at home and the Eagles look like they're dangerously close to falling apart.
Raiders 20
Eagles 13
Tampa Bay at Seattle
Haha screw you Schiano and Revis, etc.
Seahawks 23
Bucs 10
Baltimore at Cleveland
Who cares.
Ravens 20
Browns 17
Pittsburgh at New England
Screw you, Brady and Belicheck. But you'll win. Because of course.
Patriots 24
Steelers 17
Indianapolis at Houston
I'm being nice in that I'm predicting the Texans to keep it close. Meanwhile, the collective sportswriter slurping of Andrew Luck is already getting old.
Colts 24
Texans 20
Monday 11/4
Chicago at Green Bay
The Bears are teetering badly. They may fall of the cliff soon.
Packers 31
Bears 20
Last week: 11-2
Season: 76-44
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